Every day I see the fall-out from parents who have somehow convinced themselves that the lies they are telling themselves about the way they are living life won't hurt anyone other than themselves. I know young people who don't believe they are worth anything because they've been abandoned by their parents. Some of them are raising themselves because their parents are self-absorbed and choosing to satisfy their own desires rather than be a parent. A few of them have no place to call home because their parents are nowhere to be found, and then there are the ones who have every material thing and "opportunity" they want because parents have chosen to "buy them off" to excuse their guilt. Whatever the case, the kids are broken and hurting, and mom and dad are responsible regardless of what they may tell themselves.
Before I get too self-righteous about what other parents do to their kids, I have to admit that I failed too. While I invested heavily in the well-being and spiritual development of my children as they were growing up and as they suffered through a divorce at ages nine and eleven, my daughters saw their mom choose to "do life my way" for a season. We don't have to talk about it for me to know they were hurt by my lapse in living true to how I raised them. The bottom line is this - none of us can lie and think we're only hurting ourselves. That's not how it works!
Genesis 37:17-36 is the story of Joseph being sold into slavery by his brothers and their subsequent lie to cover up their evil. Before they ever "did the deed," they had hatred in their hearts for Joseph (Genesis 37:4). This grew in their hearts making the conspiracy against him an easy transition. The brothers settled for making money off the sale of Joseph to slave traders. Then they had to come up with a lie to tell their father Jacob, and in the moment, I'm sure they believed they would never be "found out."
That's how these things work. Something starts to grow in our hearts, takes root, and then when the opportunity presents itself, we take action thinking we won't hurt those we love the most. Sometimes we're foolish enough to think we won't even hurt ourselves (Isaiah 44:20). The Bible says our hearts are deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9). We don't set out to intentionally hurt our children, ourselves, or others we love, but we do.
Rarely, when we're in the moment of conspiring to do wrong do we count the cost. We don't stop to consider what one lie will cost us and those we love. We do the wrong thing, and then try to find a way to cover it up. The truth always comes out, though, and sometimes it is revealed in ways we can't predict.
Joseph's brothers came face-to-face with the "big reveal" when they sought help in Egypt during a time of famine. They discovered their brother alive and well and in the position to be their deliverer or their executioner (Genesis 42). Eventually, the brothers had to tell their father Jacob that Joseph was alive and well and living in Egypt. Their evil was turned to good; God placed Joseph where he could help his family when they needed him most, and He brought Joseph back together with his father (Genesis 45:25-28; 46:29-30).
There are consequences, natural outcomes, of what we choose to do or not do, but thankfully, we have a Heavenly Father who loves us so much that He provides a way of salvation (Psalm 50:22-23). He calls us to repent, to turn from our wrongdoing (I John 1:9-10; Acts 3:19). The consequences of sin don't go away just because we repent, but He restores us to himself and sets us on the right path again and will lead us in making restitution.
We are responsible for dealing with the consequences and for making restitution to those we've hurt. Just as Joseph's brothers couldn't give back what they had taken away from Jacob and Joseph, we alone can't restore what we have taken from ourselves and from those we love, but God can! He will provide the healing, strength, and wisdom we need to do the right thing. He has a plan to make something whole and beautiful out of the brokenness (Psalm 147:3; II Corinthians 5:17-21).
Lord, I admit that I have failed you. I decided to take my own path and that hurt you, people I love, and myself. Thank you for forgiving me and restoring me to you. I know that you can take the messes we make and turn them into something beautiful, that you will heal the hurts and make all things new, and that you can use us to help others. You don't leave us alone to make restitution.
Heavenly Father, we pray that you will shine your light of truth into our lives, reveal any deception that may be there, and cause us to turn full-face into you. Give us the courage to face those we've hurt, to admit our wrongdoing, and seek their forgiveness. Direct us through your Holy Spirit.
Thank you, Lord, for your perfect healing.
