Parenting: Extravagant Giving

When my daughter Erin was in high school, she traveled with our church youth group during the summer to Juarez, Mexico on a mission's trip. The group was there to work with the children in a very impoverished area of the city. Erin told of little boys who played in the neighborhood wearing only their "skivvies." She and her friends dubbed them the "Underwear Gang"! As their week ended, the children with whom they'd been came together for one last event. Some of the children brought gifts to give in appreciation. One little girl sought out Erin and presented her with a small, worn stuffed animal. It was obvious to Erin that this was the little girl's prized possession, yet she wanted Erin to have it as an expression of her thanks. This child who had so little practiced extravagant giving. My child who had a roomful of stuffed animals back home was humbled. More than a decade has passed, and Erin still has that precious gift as a reminder of liberal, heart-felt giving from one who had so few possessions.

In Mark 12:41-44, Jesus teaches his disciples the principle of extravagant giving. Many people were throwing money into the offering box, with the wealthy making large contributions. In the midst of this display of giving, a poor widow approached and put in two small coins, the equivalent of two cents. In our economy and in theirs, that just wasn't much money; hardly worth the effort and hardly worth noticing. But, here's what Jesus had to say about her offering: "All the others gave what they'll never miss; she gave extravagantly what she couldn't afford—she gave her all" (Mark 12:44, The Message). 

Often, the most powerful lessons that we learn come from what the world considers insignificant and not worth our notice. I am still moved by the story of the child giving my daughter her most precious toy. Her giving like that of the poor widow in Jesus's day humbles me and causes me to reassess my own giving and what it means to "give extravagantly." 

Some people like the wealthy in Mark 12 give to be seen of men. The Bible tells us that if we give so we can earn recognition and praise from those around us that we have received our reward (Matthew 6:2). Our giving isn't meant to be a means of self-promotion; we are to be "secret" in giving and allow God to provide the reward (Matthew 6:4).

Others give grudgingly. We give because we know it's something we're "supposed to do," but we sure don't like it. We may be fearful that if we give, we won't have what we need. My grandmother use to say that God owns all the cattle on the hill (Psalm 50:10) and all the 'taters in the hill. The point is this, God owns everything; we don't. He knows our needs and will supply them (Philippians 4:19). We are to give freely from what we have (Matthew 10:8b), and we are to do so cheerfully (II Corinthians 9:7)! God wants us to trust Him to the point that we can willingly and happily give everything away knowing full well that He will give back to us all we need and then some (Luke 6:38).

The Bible is rich with accounts of people who God required to step out in faith, giving their all to serve His purposes (e.g., the widow who fed Elijah - I Kings 17:8-24; the little boy who supplied the loaves and fishes that fed the multitude - John 6:8-10). Their faith and obedience were rewarded.
 
All of us have a place of need - a perceived shortage - from which we are asked to give. For some of us it may be our monetary resources; for others, our need may be represented by our lack of time or possessions or even our selves. God asks us to be generous, especially in those places where we believe we have so little, so that He can in turn bless us with His abundance and develop in us his character.

God gave his all, his only Son, who gave his all that you and I might be redeemed (John 3:16; Galatians 1:4). God wants us to learn the principle of extravagant giving, the joy of giving our all in service to Him.

Heavenly Father, thank you for giving your all so that we might know you and spend eternity with you. Thank you for your provision and for your promise to meet all our needs. Thank you for opportunities to serve you through giving. We pray for a willing heart that will give extravagantly by giving our all to you. In your name we pray. Amen

Parenting - "Friending" Jesus

If you have a Facebook presence, you understand the term "friending." I have learned that who my friends are and what they say on their own wall may reflect on me. I also know that what I put on my wall says a lot about who I am and what I believe. 

Long before we had Facebook and other virtual social networks, we learned that we needed to be careful who our friends are. Our parents cautioned that we might become "like them," so we needed to choose friends who would be a good influence over us. I hate to admit it, but they were right! In fact, the apostle Paul cautions in I Corinthians 15:33, "...bad company corrupts good character." We do tend to become like the people with whom we closely associate.

In Matthew 16:13-17, Jesus is with his disciples and asks them what people are saying about him. Some folks of the day thought he was John the Baptist or one of the prophets, but when Jesus asked his disciples who they believed him to be, Peter spoke up and declared, "You're the Christ, the Messiah, the Son of the Living God." Peter, a "close associate" of Jesus, had friended Jesus, and the Heavenly Father revealed the true nature of Jesus to him. 

The result of Peter's friendship with Jesus had greater influence than the fisherman ever imagined the day he decided to follow Christ. Jesus dubbed Peter the Rock upon which he would build his Church, a church so powerful that "...all the powers of Hell will not conquer it" (Matthew 16:18-20).

Here's what happens when we decide to friend Jesus - our lives are transformed forever! We acknowledge that we need Jesus as our Savior, and this is the first change that takes place. This was Peter's first step - God revealed to him his need for the Messiah in his life. It changed his direction for all eternity. 

The evidence of the transformation comes as we become intimate in our relationship with our Friend. We begin to talk about him, want to spend time with him, be like him. II Corinthians 5:17 tells us that when we enter into this relationship, "...The old life is gone; a new life has begun!" What once defined who we are is transformed; we are influenced. As Peter entered more deeply into knowing Jesus, he became more of who he was intended to be. The brash, impetuous Peter who proclaimed that he'd never deny Christ and who chopped off the ear of Malthus was shaped into the Apostle Peter, the church-builder, boldly preaching the Gospel, led by the anointing and power of the Holy Spirit. This Peter who turned fearful and disloyal on the night of Jesus's crucifixion became courageous for Christ and died a martyr for the Gospel.

When we start hanging out with Jesus, we find our "real selves." He begins the transformation process "re-shaping" us into who we were created to be. He shapes us to serve him. We are called to be "salt and light" to our world (Matthew 5:13-14). Jesus proclaimed that Peter and people like him are the Church that can't be destroyed. He declared, "And I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven" (Matthew 16:19). We become the Church with power to serve! 

Heavenly Father, we desire to be so intimate with you that our lives will be transformed, that we will be "salt and light" to those around us, that we will be the Church. Our prayer is that of the Psalmist: "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer" (Psalm 19:14) so that others may come to know you. Fill us to overflowing with more of You and less of ourselves. May we take on your character and be more like you. In your name we pray these things. Amen.

Parenting - The Art of Conversation With God

Communication is a two-way transaction; we speak, and we listen (or we should). My daughters allege that I don't have conversations; I lecture! "Lecturing" doesn't allow for much listening - by the lecturer or by the captive audience! I'm trying to learn to talk less and listen more.


Sometimes, I wonder if God feels that our communication with Him is one-way - us doing all the talking and God doing all the listening. Yet, if we want to know God, we must learn to communicate with Him, by talking and listening. Prayer is the way we talk to Him. Listening to God is another matter. Learning to recognize when He's talking to us is sometimes a challenge.

In our fast-paced, instant everything culture, we aren't used to "waiting on the Lord"; we want to be able to shoot Him an email or text message and get a quick, abbreviated response and then move on. Sometimes, God does work quickly; other times, He seems silent, his response not so obvious. On occasion, God responds, we don't like the response, and we choose to keep looking and listening for one we do like. One thing is certain, though - God always hears and answers our prayers.

Jesus's disciples wanted to be taught to pray; they were given the model we know as "The Lord's Prayer" (Luke 11:1-4), but the verses that follow give additional direction in the way in which we can approach our Heavenly Father (Luke 11:9-13): 

"Here's what I'm saying:

   Ask and you'll get;
   Seek and you'll find;
   Knock and the door will open. 

Don't bargain with God. Be direct. Ask for what you need.... And don't you think the Father who conceived you in love will give the Holy Spirit when you ask him?" 

This doesn't mean that we should view God as some sort of cosmic Santa Claus or over-indulgent parent that gives his child whatever he or she wants. It does mean that when we come to Him, we can be confident that He already knows what we need and is willing to provide for us - we just have to ask and believe (Matthew 21:22). We do have to trust that God knows best for us because sometimes, just as our children do, we ask for things that aren't in our best interest. We don't know the outcome if God were to give us all we desired,  when we wanted it, and in the way we wanted. He does. He knows what we need and provides (Matthew 6:33).

The other half of the communication equation is listening. Listening for his leading is far more difficult than talking to Him. Each of us has to learn to hear from God. He speaks in ways specific to each individual and each situation. The Bible tells us that as his sheep, we recognize his voice (John 10:4;27).The more we learn to listen when God speaks, the more familiar his voice becomes to us. One of the surest ways to learn his voice is to read his word. When God is speaking to us, or when we think He is, we can validate what He's saying by ensuring that what we're hearing lines up with what we read in the Bible. 

Pastor Rick Warren, author of Purpose Driven Life, provides seven ways to determine if what we're hearing is from God:

• Does it agree with the Bible? (Luke 21:33) - If what you're hearing doesn't line up with God's word, it's not from the Lord.
• Does it make me more like Christ?(Philippians 2:5) - In other words, if what you think is of the Lord will result in behavior unlike that of Christ, then don't do it!
• Does my church family confirm it? (Ephesians 3:10; Proverbs 11:9) - God puts mature Christians in our lives for a reason; if no one mature in his or her faith supports what you're "hearing," reconsider.
• Is it consistent with how God has shaped me? (Ephesians 2:10; Romans 12:6) - Each of us is designed for a unique purpose that no one else can accomplish. If what you believe is from God isn't aligned to your "shape," then rethink what you're hearing.
• Does it concern my responsibility? (Romans 14) - We need to be concerned about God's will for our own lives and allow Him to direct everyone else's lives. In other words, we must be careful in assuming we know what God's will is for others. God may have us tell someone something, but Pastor Warren says to consider three things before acting:
  
  
• God will use you to confirm what He's already said to them. 
• If He uses you to help someone else, you may be unaware that what you are saying is meeting a deeper need than you could have imagined in their lives.
• Trust God to speak to that person before you do.  

• Is it convicting rather than condemning? (I John 1:9; Revelation 12:10) - When God speaks to convict us, He is specific and forgives us immediately when we ask; then, He forgets. Satan simply desires to make us feel bad for what God has already forgiven and forgotten and attempts to convince us that we are worthless.
  
• Do I sense God's peace about it? (I Corinthians 14:33) - God doesn't bring confusion. If what you're hearing is from God, you will know peace if you are obedient and act on what He's saying to you. He's not interested in your making a hasty decision, one that causes you to feel pressure and stress; He does want you to make the decision that He's leading you to.

As we grow in our walk with God, we must learn to art of conversing with Him. That does mean we must be intentional in setting aside time to read his word and listen for his voice. We must learn to be aware when He is speaking and respond. For parents, knowing how to talk and how to listen to God is one of the greatest tools we have for raising our children to be fully devoted followers of Christ.


Heavenly Father, I am thankful that you talk to us. My prayer is that we learn to listen, so that we will know your purpose and your direction for our lives. I pray that each of us will rely on you in all things and have the peace that only you can give as we learn to walk in your will.

 

Parenting - Strength Training: More Than a New Year's Resolution

I'm a regular at the YMCA, and I run. When January 1 rolls around every year, I know that we "regulars" are going to be in competition for our favorite machines and weights with the "new year resolution crowd." I also know that in a few weeks the interruption to my routine will have ended because many of the "newbies" will have "grown weary in well-doing." I too have to guard against the temptation to slack off because I am certain that as soon as I fail in my faithfulness to my fitness routine, I will become one of those who "grow weary" and lose the resolution to stay strong.


Being a Christian, requires "strength" training 24/7, 365 days of the year. We aren't able to let down our guard or become lazy. Following Christ requires that we not go on "auto-pilot." We are running a race that has an eternal prize for those who run to win (I Corinthians 9:24-27). It's when we are out of condition, when we are weak, that stuff happens.  


Before Jesus launched his public ministry, he was led into the wilderness by the Spirit and tested by Satan (Luke 4:1-13). Jesus fasted 40 days and 40 nights before the Devil tempted him with 3 propositions. Satan taunted Jesus, in his weakened physical state, telling him that if he really were God's son he should command the stones to become bread. When Jesus didn't succumb, the Devil tried twice more to trap Jesus by suggesting he jump from a high place, since the angels would save him, and that Jesus could possess all the kingdoms of this world if he would worship Satan. In all three situations, Jesus resisted the temptations and defeated the Devil at his game by quoting God's word.

Jesus "stayed strong" when Satan confronted him. For every temptation that the Devil threw at him, Jesus refuted him with Truth, but Jesus didn't enter this time of testing unprepared. Luke 4:1 says he went into the wilderness full of the Holy Spirit; he was led there by the Spirit. He wasn't alone, and he wasn't without strength and endurance when he was tired and weak from not having eaten for 40 days and nights and from the Devil's tests.

We too are tested, and generally the "big tests" come when we are in our most weakened state. The Devil knows our "soft spots" and attacks. He isn't necessarily blatant but is more inclined to twist truth or to use subtlety, just as he did in testing Jesus. He manipulated scripture. This is the way Satan works. It's the tactic he used with Eve in the Garden, and he's still successfully using his methods on us today.

If we are to stand firm in our confession of faith in times of strength and weakness, here are some things we need to know:

• Anyone wanting to live a godly life will be persecuted (II Timothy 3:12). We must be prepared for what is inevitable. Satan isn't content to leave us alone once we determine to live for Christ. He's looking for company to share his eternity (I Peter 5:8). He may promise what the human ego craves - fame, fortune, power - but it comes with a very high price and the rewards are short lived.
• We have Truth on our side, and we must rely on the Holy Spirit to give us discernment to recognize Truth from the Devil's lies. Paul reminds Timothy that some people will look for teachers to feed them "spiritual junk food" but to not be distracted by what is false (II Timothy 4:3-4). 
• The Holy Spirit is with us to teach us and help us to remember God's word (John 14:26; Luke 12:12). God has provided a Helper, the Holy Spirit, for all times of our lives; we have to do our part, though, and study God's word and hide it in our hearts so that when we are being tempted or are going through difficult times, the Holy Spirit can cause us to remember it.
• We have a strong defense, but it's our responsibility to prepare. Ephesians 6:12-18 (The Message) puts it this way:

And that about wraps it up. God is strong, and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we'll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels. 

Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You'll need them throughout your life. God's Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other's spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.

As we set out to begin a new year, we must determine and stay true to that resolve to be strong in our walk with the Lord. Our strength comes from the Lord (Philippians 4:13), and we are "conquerors" (Romans 8:37).

Heavenly Father, thank you for providing all we require to "live strong" in our walk with you. I pray that we will be diligent in spending time with You, in learning your word, and in putting it into practice in our lives. As we live out our faith, let our children and all with whom we interact see You at work in and through us. May they learn dependence upon You and see your faithfulness to us in how we live our lives. In your name we pray, Amen.

 

 

Parenting - Raising Jesus

Have you ever wondered what it was like to be Mary and Joseph, given the unprecedented responsibility of raising God's Son? From the moment of his conception, they knew he was to become no "regular" kid. They not only experienced the same sort of wonder that most parents do at the birth of a child, but these new parents and their newborn child were visited by shepherds, heavenly hosts of angels, and wise men. The Bible says Mary "...kept all these things to herself, holding them dear, deep within herself" (Luke 2:19). She already knew she had a special child on her hands; she just didn't know what that meant.

We know that Mary and Joseph had to flee their homeland to protect Jesus from the ordered infanticide, and we know they returned when God gave the "all clear" and set up housekeeping in Nazareth.

The next account we have of the young Jesus is when the family made their annual trip to Jerusalem for Passover. He was twelve and doing what the son of all devout Jewish families did, but he failed to make the return trip with the family. After a day of travel, Mary and Joseph realized Jesus wasn't with the group and returned to Jerusalem to look for him. They found him in deep discourse with the teachers in the Temple, astounding those religious leaders with his understanding.

Any parent who has become separated from a child in a store can relate to the panic Mary and Joseph must have felt and to Mary's outburst when she found him: "Young man, why have you done this to us? Your father and I have been half out of our minds looking for you" (Luke 2:48, The Message). I easily imagine the tone of her voice! But most of us wouldn't have received a response from our "lost" child such as the one Mary got from Jesus: "Why were you looking for me? Didn't you know that I had to be here, dealing with the things of my Father" (Luke 2:49, The Message)? Again, the Bible tells us that Mary kept this and other "curiosities" of his growing up to herself, pondering them (Luke 2:51).

Mary knew she had been chosen to be mother to Messiah, but she had no idea what this meant. She may have wondered from time to time, "How does one raise Messiah?" It's a worthy question, and as parents we too should ask the question of ourselves, "How does one raise children to know the Lord and choose to live for Him?"

Mary and Joseph lived devoutly before God, setting the example for Jesus. They did what they knew to do in accordance with the teachings of the Old Testament. They knew God's expectations of them by knowing God's Word.

We can set the stage for our own children to know God by knowing Him ourselves. Learning who God is means reading and knowing His words. Our children need to see us reading the Bible, digesting it, and applying it in our own lives. We must read it to our children and teach it to them (Deuteronomy 6:7). We must ensure that we and our children are actively part of a community of believers (Hebrews 10:25).

Mary didn't fully understand who Jesus would become, or what His life would look like as Messiah, but she did know that He was called to a special purpose. Each of us, including our children, have a unique calling on our lives. II Timothy 3:16-17 says that all scripture is "...useful one way or another - showing us truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting our mistakes, training us to live God's way." Further, these verses go on to say that through God's Word we are "...put together and shaped up for the tasks God has for us" (II Timothy 3:17). If we want to know that purpose and live accordingly, we must know His Word.

While we aren't raising Jesus, we are parenting children who are called with a holy purpose (II Timothy 1:9), so as Mary and Joseph lived devoted to God and set the example for Jesus, we too must follow their lead. Knowing God and His Word will give us the advantage of having clarity when making decisions regarding our children, the strength to stand firm in the face of cultural influences that run counter to God's way, the essentials for laying a solid foundation on which our children will grow, and direction when discerning what God has called us and our children to become.

Matthew Henry, 17th century theologian, said the following:

"Those who would learn the things of God, and be assured of them, must know the Holy Scriptures, for they are the Divine revelation. The age of children is the age to learn; and those who would get true learning, must get it out of the Scriptures (emphasis added)....It is of use to all, for all need to be taught, corrected, and reproved. There is something in the Scriptures suitable for every case. Oh that we may love our Bibles more, and keep closer to them!...We best oppose error by promoting a solid knowledge of the word of truth; and the greatest kindness we can do to children, is to make them early to know the Bible (emphasis added)."

Dear Lord, I pray that You will give us the desire for your Word; that You will open our understanding through your Holy Spirit. I pray that we will be deeply impressed with the urgency to teach our children who You are. I pray that we will plant the seeds of your Word deep in their hearts from the very beginning of their lives so they may grow in You and fulfill your calling on their lives. Amen.